Remember this

Today has been one of those days- everything was chaotic at work before 9am. And yet there were no tears, or screams, or any other meltdown-like behaviours. I'm proud of myself. I left work smiling because today I achieved things I never dreamed of.

There were many assumptions and mis-communications with a commercial client today. All before anyone else in the office was in. 

Apologies

I want to apologise for the silence. I'm poorly at the moment. Which is hard because life in general is going so unbelievably well. I'm having moments of such joy, things are just wonderful but my head says no. I cannot tell you about how much I love work, or the amazing training day I went on, or the fab way I experienced God this weekend, or the new exciting peer support group I'm going to be part of or how I encouraged someone massively today. I want to tell you about them, but the memories are so tinged with darkness that right now I don't think I'd do these things justice. Later in the week I hope to finish a post I've been writing for almost 2 months, Maybe I'll write another "day in the life of..." but right now? I am empty. Words are not coming easily. Nothing is easy. I'm battling such darkness, and at times like these, I wish the darkness would hurry up and win.

I'm sorry, but I guess this is the life of a mental health blogger?!